Selected thoughts from an interview with Dr Nathaniel Branden, author of The Psychology of Romantic Love.
We live in an age in which feelings are fading frighteningly, and most people lack honesty and passion. This shows clearly in their relationships with their partners, and so they deprive themselves and their partners of real, passionate love. We need to return to warm, honest emotion.
Real love takes enough courage and high self-esteem. Romantic love can be frightening: we see our partner as tremendously important, and this goes with surrender, not to the other person but to our own feelings for them.
The difficulty lies in the possibility of losing the partner. Needing romantic love creates a sense of risk, frightening and nerve-racking. That's why romantic love isn't for children: they don't yet feel the need to take care of themselves the way adults do.
When we are happy with ourselves, we don't expect or ask our partner to meet all our other needs, because we already feel at ease with them.
People need romantic love in a relationship where they feel mutual love, deep appreciation and acceptance by the other. We need to respect and be respected, to reach a healthy romantic relationship with our partner.
Like
Love
Angry
Dislike
